So I'm supposed to be staring at the conductor's score and re arranging a score for a quartet now. But, Alicia Keys is playing on iTunes and I'm just in no mood to do any more work this week. Its been the most busy (but I dare say) and satisfying week Boston for me. Life has never been so different in the United States of America, once you have travelled Europe and here, you would dare say you know how to relate to many things in life now (still with much more to experience though). I see icicles forming outside my window, the weather has dropped at a frantic rate in the past few days, it was -2 today in the morning, and its not even December yet. AND the winds were giving my face and hands an icy blow job. I will be going home for good in about 2 months time. Its hard to leave Boston now, leaving friends, teachers and experiences behind. Friends from every corner of the world united here, like family and brothers that I have overseas. But I know I must do it, for in the future, I will not be doing this full time. It doesn't make it any easier when they come up to you and say "Deon, we are going to make you stay! You have to stay!" does it? Coming here really really opened my eyes and heart once again, especially after being emotionally and mentally slaughtered for the past 2 years.

Walking the streets of Boston at night, holding a Dunkin Donuts cup in one hand and just breathing out to see your breath smog up is really calming. Although it seems like you can be mugged any time, people usually avoid the quiet chinese guy in fear that he may whip out 2 guns or kick your ass with kung fu at the slightest hint of irritation.

Being away and talking to people who are my age or older, in pursuit of that golden dream of making it big in something they love really allows you to grow and understand more about the world. On the surface I remain the same, but underneath it all there is a gradual acceptance and peace with my surroundings and life itself. Not rebellious, and wild, and mentally unsound anymore. But really just pure acceptance and a calm I have never felt before in my short 21 years. Suddenly I know my purpose and what I want in life. And I realize the beauty of life itself and the a beauty that Singapore never seemed to have in my eyes in the past. Everything I was looking for in life was right in my hands. But I was never satisfied, never happy, always complaining, always on the move, looking for more to do without analyzing what was in front of me. It took 1 year of my time, one year to learn to grow, one year to find what I have been looking for at least for the next phase of my life. It has been the most amazing amazing journey. What was I thinking!? Haha, I can't believe I'm in Boston right now? Where did I get the guts to throw it all away to come here! Sometimes I really surprise myself. It was worth every single second though. 21 21 21.

Music, the deepest end of me, being analyzed and studied here and for me to really get into my own core and discover myself and learn to accept it, instead of an endless pursuit. Now I know what Berklee is really for. Its not for you to learn how to be a great musician. Anyone can do that without a school. Its for you to learn how to be the best person you can be. Thats why it only took John Mayer and Diana Krall 1 year in Berklee to know enough and leave school to hit the road. Now I understand.

I would like to thank my parents for having me and accepting me without even considering any consequences, and for a un-expecting and awesome 21st birthday gift of sending me to Boston, for me to realize myself, for me to realize what I really want, for me to know what I really need and for me to learn how to really cherish them.